"I am calling it a graduation, not a funeral," she announced.
She had been thinking about this for a long time. Having gone through a near death experience with her recent bout with brain cancer, she had a refreshing and open attitude about death. She had compared her feelings with other cancer patients and discovered that those cancer victims with a Christian faith now had no fear of death. Cancer is such a frightening, paralyzing word that everyone associates that word with death. But death can come to each of us at anytime, not necessarily from cancer. So how does one prepare?
She realized that everyone basically ignores, denies or fears death. Today's culture worships life with all its comforts, joys, pleasures, materialism, physical fitness, fashions and self-glorification. Why be worried or even bothered with the thought that life will end one day; however near or far. Life had so much to offer....certainly things would go on 'forever' just as they presently existed.
That's the frame of mind she had been in. Life was good....no health problems (her yearly physical exams were close to 'boring'), four super accomplished well educated children, twelve healthy wonderful grandchildren, no financial worries, a husband who adored her. What could be better? Oh sure, she knew someday the end of life would come...yes....someday....somehow. And she had a strong faith. She believed Jesus. She believed He rose from the dead. She believed she would go to heaven. After all He had promised that and she had accepted Jesus into her heart.
But then reality and 'the day' had arrived. "You have a rare, aggressive cancer in the brain. You have seven weeks to live." The words of the oncologist rang in her ears. That had been the unexpected moment....the 'bell' had sounded.
The week before the brain biopsy was the worst week. The cancer had not yet been clearly identified and therefore no treatment had started. She was acutely ill. Family members later told her she was dying before their eyes! Hideous nightmares flooded her brain. She could not sleep. The nightmares interrupted her sleep as she experienced an eerie, strange battle going on. She felt an evil spirit engulfed in a dark, oppressive cloud trying to pull her toward him. And yet she felt loving arms encompassing and holding her. What was going on?
And then it became obvious to her. Satan was trying to pull her to him and Jesus was lovingly holding her. At one point she said, "Why are you trying so hard to get me, Satan? I'm not that important."
A dear friend of Glenn and Stephanie, Maya a powerful prayer warrior, came to her aid and strongly commanded Satan to leave, in Jesus name! The nightmares stopped.
On the day of the brain biopsy, she had a strange dream. She was in a tunnel, sitting in a wheelchair. The tunnel was quiet. A continual procession of figures, cloaked, with faces unseen, passed slowly and quietly by, from left to right. She had the absolute impression she was on her way to heaven. Then suddenly, someone turned her wheelchair around and she woke up in her hospital bed. She often thought of that moment. She knew the Lord had made a decision that he wanted her in this earthly life for a while longer.
She had concluded this earthly life is a school. There is so much to learn, choices to make, we have free will to live the life we choose. God is always present in this earthly life to teach us, to give us choices. As she looked back over the many years she had lived, she knew that she had made many mistakes, done a lot of stupid things, said insincere and hurtful comments....yet God loved her and forgave her. The naive, self-centered schoolgirl had studied, followed the Biblical coursework and would at some time 'graduate'. Probably not with 'honors' but at least with 'recognition'....true and faithful servant.
So now she was preparing for that glorious "Graduation Day" when she would graduate from this earthly life to spend eternity with Jesus. Instead of a 'funeral' or 'memorial' she wanted it called 'graduation'. And on this Easter Sunday, what better way to celebrate that thought. "He is not here; for He is risen, as He said." (Matthew 28:6) What an incredible gift! Jesus rose from the dead! We have the assurance we will enter Paradise because Jesus defeated death!
"Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father's house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also." John 14:1-3
Sunday, March 31, 2013
Monday, March 18, 2013
Therapy is a full-time job!
After months and months of physical (PT) and occupational (OT) therapy she could honestly say that therapy is a full-time job! She had started therapy at Upstate Hospital in Syracuse with initial steps in walking and using her arm. She remembered the first day in their gym when they showed her four stairs to climb. Still feeling very weak and foggy from the brain biopsy and 2 months of intensive chemotherapy she remembered the sheer determination that propelled her up and down those steps. She collapsed into her wheelchair visibly shaking with fatigue but she had proved to herself she could do it!
Now three years had passed by and she continued with OT and PT determined to improve muscle and nerve activity in her right arm and leg so that she could live independently. As she looked back she realized there were improvements, ever so slight and ever so slow, but she had never gone backward in her strengthening and mobility.
God was with her, ever standing by her side, constantly whispering words of encouragement . Some days the challenge seemed overwhelming but she would hear a small voice, "Come on, Janet, you can do it. I'll help you. I am with you." And then her step quickened, her shoulders drew back, her head lifted, and she faced with confidence the new challenge.
Her weeks at MaryFreeBed made her feel exultant! Liz and Janna worked patiently, tirelessly and professionally. She was amazed at how they knew what muscles needed more work and more exercise. They were able to identify the areas of weakness by monitoring her moves, by touching the muscles. One day she said to them, "I can see that you don't learn about OT and PT by reading a book or attending a lecture. You learn by doing. Only 'hands on' experience can teach you." Yes, these therapists knew and that is why they could help her.
Every time she left MaryFreeBed after therapy she was exhausted but on a high. What they helped her do.....what joy filled her from their positive encouragement! And she would return home confident she could continue the exercises and progress on her own at home.
On March 15 she entered a new phase of therapy. Dr. V., the physiatrist (nerve/muscle) physician on staff at MaryFreeBed injected her right forearm with a series of intramuscular injections (using 27 gauge needle) of Botox! She had met with Dr. V. a few weeks earlier and had discussed with him the Botox therapy. One friend commented after hearing about the new therapy, "Oh Janet, you are going to have the most beautiful arm!" But she wasn't interested in beautiful arms, but only in well functioning arms.
The injections were basically painless, just pricks and some discomfort. But she was amazed. One injection in her forearm was felt all the way up to her bicep! The intent of the Botox therapy was to eliminate the 'tone' and 'spasticity' in her forearm, especially the wrist. The damage done in the left thalamus of the brain from the cancer had effected the nerves and muscles of the arm so that they were not performing correctly. The Botox would relax the forearm muscles and nerves so that with the proper exercise and stimulation the brain would remind the arm of its proper function.
Now, this is where the Bioness arm device comes in. She had recently acquired the arm device which when applied to the arm stimulated the nerve endings via the electrical conductors. Now with the muscles relaxed from the Botox, the Bioness device would be able to achieve better results.
So, while in Dr. V's office she put it on to show how this would all work. To simplify the application Dick removed the wrist band that, if necessary, prevented the device from falling off the arm.
The Botox procedure proved overwhelming....new procedure, new environment...all scary with a lot of 'unknowns'. So she was exhausted, drained and emotionally weak after they left MaryFreeBed. Upon returning back to Holland, after lunch and a nap, they took the Bioness device out of the bag to start her daily 90 minute applications for phase one and two. All of a sudden they realized the safety strap was missing. They fretted over that, wondering where they had left it.
It just so happened that at that moment the phone rang. Dick answered. The nurse from Dr. V's office at MaryFreeBed spoke. "We have your safety strap from your Bioness device. We'll send it over to Liz and you can pick it up when you come in on Monday for your OT appointment."
Then the most amazing message hit her. "That was a God thing," she told Dick. "The Lord gave me a message...'I am taking care of you Janet'!"
In the reality of all she was facing...OT and PT challenges, continual struggles over physical functions, fatigue, frustrations, emotional ups and downs, she had a concrete reminder. YES, God was taking care of her! "If God be for us, who can be against us?" (Romans 8:31)
By Sunday, the wrist was flat (no more 'tone') and the fingers were relaxed. Praise the Lord! He is good!
Now three years had passed by and she continued with OT and PT determined to improve muscle and nerve activity in her right arm and leg so that she could live independently. As she looked back she realized there were improvements, ever so slight and ever so slow, but she had never gone backward in her strengthening and mobility.
God was with her, ever standing by her side, constantly whispering words of encouragement . Some days the challenge seemed overwhelming but she would hear a small voice, "Come on, Janet, you can do it. I'll help you. I am with you." And then her step quickened, her shoulders drew back, her head lifted, and she faced with confidence the new challenge.
Her weeks at MaryFreeBed made her feel exultant! Liz and Janna worked patiently, tirelessly and professionally. She was amazed at how they knew what muscles needed more work and more exercise. They were able to identify the areas of weakness by monitoring her moves, by touching the muscles. One day she said to them, "I can see that you don't learn about OT and PT by reading a book or attending a lecture. You learn by doing. Only 'hands on' experience can teach you." Yes, these therapists knew and that is why they could help her.
Every time she left MaryFreeBed after therapy she was exhausted but on a high. What they helped her do.....what joy filled her from their positive encouragement! And she would return home confident she could continue the exercises and progress on her own at home.
On March 15 she entered a new phase of therapy. Dr. V., the physiatrist (nerve/muscle) physician on staff at MaryFreeBed injected her right forearm with a series of intramuscular injections (using 27 gauge needle) of Botox! She had met with Dr. V. a few weeks earlier and had discussed with him the Botox therapy. One friend commented after hearing about the new therapy, "Oh Janet, you are going to have the most beautiful arm!" But she wasn't interested in beautiful arms, but only in well functioning arms.
The injections were basically painless, just pricks and some discomfort. But she was amazed. One injection in her forearm was felt all the way up to her bicep! The intent of the Botox therapy was to eliminate the 'tone' and 'spasticity' in her forearm, especially the wrist. The damage done in the left thalamus of the brain from the cancer had effected the nerves and muscles of the arm so that they were not performing correctly. The Botox would relax the forearm muscles and nerves so that with the proper exercise and stimulation the brain would remind the arm of its proper function.
Now, this is where the Bioness arm device comes in. She had recently acquired the arm device which when applied to the arm stimulated the nerve endings via the electrical conductors. Now with the muscles relaxed from the Botox, the Bioness device would be able to achieve better results.
So, while in Dr. V's office she put it on to show how this would all work. To simplify the application Dick removed the wrist band that, if necessary, prevented the device from falling off the arm.
The Botox procedure proved overwhelming....new procedure, new environment...all scary with a lot of 'unknowns'. So she was exhausted, drained and emotionally weak after they left MaryFreeBed. Upon returning back to Holland, after lunch and a nap, they took the Bioness device out of the bag to start her daily 90 minute applications for phase one and two. All of a sudden they realized the safety strap was missing. They fretted over that, wondering where they had left it.
It just so happened that at that moment the phone rang. Dick answered. The nurse from Dr. V's office at MaryFreeBed spoke. "We have your safety strap from your Bioness device. We'll send it over to Liz and you can pick it up when you come in on Monday for your OT appointment."
Then the most amazing message hit her. "That was a God thing," she told Dick. "The Lord gave me a message...'I am taking care of you Janet'!"
In the reality of all she was facing...OT and PT challenges, continual struggles over physical functions, fatigue, frustrations, emotional ups and downs, she had a concrete reminder. YES, God was taking care of her! "If God be for us, who can be against us?" (Romans 8:31)
By Sunday, the wrist was flat (no more 'tone') and the fingers were relaxed. Praise the Lord! He is good!
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
Truth and Power
Truth and Power
Here it is March, 2013, and yet she remembered clearly the critical events that took place those life-changing months of 2010 and 2011. Dr. C., the oncologist at Upstate Hospital in Syracuse, NY had put her on a regimen of methotrexate chemotherapy immediately after the diagnosis of CNS lymphoma in the left thalamus of the brain was confirmed. That chemo had continued for sixteen months! For the first 4 months in Syracuse, the chemo was given every 2 weeks during her 4 month hospital stay. But after her discharge from Upstate Hospital the regimen changed. Her chemo in Michigan basically involved hospital stays lasting about one week each month.
Critical to the chemo regimen was the flushing out the chemo after it had been injected and given time to destroy the cancer cells. She understood that chemo was essentially a poisonous substance that had to be thoroughly flushed out of the body so the healthy cells would not be destroyed. She knew how scary the whole process was, but now in 2013, the doctors were amazed at how well she had tolerated this invasion into her body and her health had returned.
She remembered how the nurses kept a running score on her board in the hospital room of the methotrexate level. During each entire hospital stay she had continuous IV fluids circulating through her body and the administration of the chemo and IV fluids was all dependent on the ph level of her urine. She remembered how the nurses kept close watch on these factors. Then once the chemo had run its course, the vigil ensued as the methotrexate level in her body had to decrease to 0.05. She constantly tried to assist in reducing this number by drinking lots of fluids but the IV fluid always proved to be the most effective.
The month of February, 2011 was especially memorable. Since the end of October, 2010 she was in Michigan and after 6 months of chemotherapy she was getting used to the idea of admission to the hospital on Monday and (if levels were satisfactory) discharge on Friday. Who chose to stay longer than necessary?
That week in February on Thursday night she knew the methotrexate level had to go down 6 points by Friday morning for her to be discharged. The 'magic' number was 0.05 ph urine. So she prayed fervently for that to happen. And during the night she had a dream.
She saw a beautiful box decorated in shimmering gold sitting on a pile of straw. There were many angels hovering over the box and printed on the box in plain numerals was "0.05".
She awoke Friday morning and the early lab results announced 0.05 for her methotrexate level! She was thrilled knowing she could go home that day and amazed at the memory of her dream. God was praised! He had heard her prayers and answered. She rejoiced knowing He was constantly guiding her during this cancer treatment.
BUT then at 7:30 am, Dr. A., her oncologist in Holland and Grand Rapids, entered her hospital room and told her that the creatine level of her kidneys was elevated. Dr A. was concerned. The chemo had begun to have a negative effect on her kidneys. This was serious. Her kidneys could not tolerate any damage. Kidney problems could lead to kidney failure and the possibility of requiring dialysis. As a nurse she knew the importance of healthy working kidneys! This emphasized to her how devastating, powerful and critical the chemo treatments were.
When Dick arrived that morning she told him the good news about the MTX level but also now the kidney concerns. Because of the elevated creatine levels Dr. A. told her she had to lengthen the hospital stay until the levels returned to normal. She and Dick were both upset. Ugh! Another day and night in the hospital....another night that he had to return to their condo alone. Time for serious prayer!
Late that afternoon after Dick had gone home, she picked up her Bible and it just happened (!) to open to the last chapter of Ephesians. She began reading, starting with verse 10 of chapter 6 about putting on the full armor of God in our battle with Satan. When she got to verse 16, a thunderbolt hit her!
"taking the shield of faith, with which you can quench all the flaming darts of the evil one".
She realized with utmost clarity that, of course, Satan was attacking her precious, healthy kidneys!
The chemo therapy was progressing well and she realized the Enemy wanted to mess that up. She immediately prayed, "Satan, in the powerful name of Jesus, leave my kidneys alone!" And she repeated that directive throughout the night. She knew that Jesus is all powerful, all knowing, greater than any evil spirit and she believed how mighty He is.
The next morning, Saturday, her creatine level was normal at 1.1, down from 1.3! Again God was present, God heard her prayers, God performed a miracle and she could now go home. The kidneys were not harmed. God had chosen to bless her because He had more work for her to do....to spread His story of love and faithfulness to everyone she came in contact with.
She knew this underscored the mighty Truth and Power of Jesus!
"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we are not contending against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world rulers of this present darkness, against the spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore take the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having girded your loins with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the equipment of the gospel of peace; besides all these, taking the shield of faith, with which you can quench all the flaming darts of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God." Ephesians 6: 10-17
Here it is March, 2013, and yet she remembered clearly the critical events that took place those life-changing months of 2010 and 2011. Dr. C., the oncologist at Upstate Hospital in Syracuse, NY had put her on a regimen of methotrexate chemotherapy immediately after the diagnosis of CNS lymphoma in the left thalamus of the brain was confirmed. That chemo had continued for sixteen months! For the first 4 months in Syracuse, the chemo was given every 2 weeks during her 4 month hospital stay. But after her discharge from Upstate Hospital the regimen changed. Her chemo in Michigan basically involved hospital stays lasting about one week each month.
Critical to the chemo regimen was the flushing out the chemo after it had been injected and given time to destroy the cancer cells. She understood that chemo was essentially a poisonous substance that had to be thoroughly flushed out of the body so the healthy cells would not be destroyed. She knew how scary the whole process was, but now in 2013, the doctors were amazed at how well she had tolerated this invasion into her body and her health had returned.
She remembered how the nurses kept a running score on her board in the hospital room of the methotrexate level. During each entire hospital stay she had continuous IV fluids circulating through her body and the administration of the chemo and IV fluids was all dependent on the ph level of her urine. She remembered how the nurses kept close watch on these factors. Then once the chemo had run its course, the vigil ensued as the methotrexate level in her body had to decrease to 0.05. She constantly tried to assist in reducing this number by drinking lots of fluids but the IV fluid always proved to be the most effective.
The month of February, 2011 was especially memorable. Since the end of October, 2010 she was in Michigan and after 6 months of chemotherapy she was getting used to the idea of admission to the hospital on Monday and (if levels were satisfactory) discharge on Friday. Who chose to stay longer than necessary?
That week in February on Thursday night she knew the methotrexate level had to go down 6 points by Friday morning for her to be discharged. The 'magic' number was 0.05 ph urine. So she prayed fervently for that to happen. And during the night she had a dream.
She saw a beautiful box decorated in shimmering gold sitting on a pile of straw. There were many angels hovering over the box and printed on the box in plain numerals was "0.05".
She awoke Friday morning and the early lab results announced 0.05 for her methotrexate level! She was thrilled knowing she could go home that day and amazed at the memory of her dream. God was praised! He had heard her prayers and answered. She rejoiced knowing He was constantly guiding her during this cancer treatment.
BUT then at 7:30 am, Dr. A., her oncologist in Holland and Grand Rapids, entered her hospital room and told her that the creatine level of her kidneys was elevated. Dr A. was concerned. The chemo had begun to have a negative effect on her kidneys. This was serious. Her kidneys could not tolerate any damage. Kidney problems could lead to kidney failure and the possibility of requiring dialysis. As a nurse she knew the importance of healthy working kidneys! This emphasized to her how devastating, powerful and critical the chemo treatments were.
When Dick arrived that morning she told him the good news about the MTX level but also now the kidney concerns. Because of the elevated creatine levels Dr. A. told her she had to lengthen the hospital stay until the levels returned to normal. She and Dick were both upset. Ugh! Another day and night in the hospital....another night that he had to return to their condo alone. Time for serious prayer!
Late that afternoon after Dick had gone home, she picked up her Bible and it just happened (!) to open to the last chapter of Ephesians. She began reading, starting with verse 10 of chapter 6 about putting on the full armor of God in our battle with Satan. When she got to verse 16, a thunderbolt hit her!
"taking the shield of faith, with which you can quench all the flaming darts of the evil one".
She realized with utmost clarity that, of course, Satan was attacking her precious, healthy kidneys!
The chemo therapy was progressing well and she realized the Enemy wanted to mess that up. She immediately prayed, "Satan, in the powerful name of Jesus, leave my kidneys alone!" And she repeated that directive throughout the night. She knew that Jesus is all powerful, all knowing, greater than any evil spirit and she believed how mighty He is.
The next morning, Saturday, her creatine level was normal at 1.1, down from 1.3! Again God was present, God heard her prayers, God performed a miracle and she could now go home. The kidneys were not harmed. God had chosen to bless her because He had more work for her to do....to spread His story of love and faithfulness to everyone she came in contact with.
She knew this underscored the mighty Truth and Power of Jesus!
"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we are not contending against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world rulers of this present darkness, against the spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore take the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having girded your loins with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the equipment of the gospel of peace; besides all these, taking the shield of faith, with which you can quench all the flaming darts of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God." Ephesians 6: 10-17
Saturday, March 2, 2013
A Promise Given
A Promise Given
"Abraham never wavered in believing God's promise. In fact his faith grew stronger, and in this he brought glory to God. He was absolutely convinced that God was able to do anything he promised."
Romans 4: 20-21
She had a story and she wanted to tell everyone. She never forgot it. She never put it far from her mind. It had been something she had never experienced before. It brought tears to her eyes every time she thought about it because it had been so incredulous, so unexpected, so unearthly...and yet so real.
Now, 2 1/2 years later, she realized some people silently scoffed at her story, some thought she was delusional, some dismissed her as irrational, some now avoided her. But there were others who believed as she did, who had 'goosebumps' upon hearing the details, and were inspired and warmed by her story.
But, no matter what others concluded, she knew she had to share with any who would listen, what she saw and heard that night.
May 26, 2010
She went to bed early that evening. During the past few weeks that month of May, she had not been her usual energetic self so she thought a good night's sleep would help.
They were at their Canadian lake house and the intriguing sound of loons on the peaceful lake lulled her to sleep. The comfortable queen size bed in the downstairs guest bedroom of their roomy lakefront retirement home gave her a feeling of luxury. She knew Dick would soon join her after enjoying the latest baseball game on TV.
It was the middle of the night. Suddenly, she turned over in bed, half awake. Something caused her to stir. What was it? And then a vision appeared directly in front of her face. She partially awoke aware of a glorious event happening right before her very eyes. She saw something wondrous. A beautiful cushioned throne, glistening in a mass of sparkling golden rays appeared before her astonished face. The golden rays looked like sunbeams but they were coming from the throne. They shone with intensity like nothing she had ever seen before. The golden rays kept moving back and forth creating a visual wonder of gold sparkling intensity.
Someone was sitting on the throne and she somehow knew without a doubt that the person was none other than JESUS! Her heart leaped. With breathless anticipation she humbly realized she had a special visit from the Lord Himself. She did not see His face. It was blurred. But there was what looked like a crown on His head shining brightly in sparkling, radiating gold. Everything was glistening in gold, even the plain colored robe He was wearing.
His hands rested on the arms of the throne and in His left hand He held a sphere--circular, multi-colored and radiating in golden sparkles. She wondered ....what did the round ball of magnificent colors and golden rays mean?
Then she heard a voice. He spoke. A voice of authority, power and love filled her ears. The voice communicated warmth as He spoke in beautiful, caring tones. "You will be healed. BUT in My own time-frame".
She not only heard the words but she saw them, like the news updates scrolling across the bottom of the TV screen. The word 'but' was emphasized by the power in His voice and appeared in capitol letters.
And then silence. The vision left. The night surrounded her again.
Her immediate unspoken response was, "That's nice of you, Lord, but I'm not that sick. Please help someone who needs you more than me."
Suddenly Dick awoke. "Janet, who was just talking to you?"
Dick had heard the voice!
Six weeks later she was diagnosed with CNS lymphoma located in the left thalamus of the brain. On July 8, 2010 the oncologist told her she had a rare, aggressive cancer and she had 7 weeks to live.
But she had continued to live, continued to heal ever so slowly and the MRIs continued to be clear since August of 2010!
That vision had sustained her through 16 months of chemo, the inability to walk and then the slow tedious therapy to remind the nerves to work again, the devastating fatigue, the emotional post-brain trauma depression, the fears, the doubts, the questioning, the struggles. Yes, that vision had held on to her and she believed in it.
She wondered about it numerous times. Was that really Jesus or an angel who delivered that message? She knew from the scripture that whenever anyone was visited by an angel or the Lord they fell face downward in a trance. She thought of Daniel and Paul and John. But then she thought of Mary and Joseph. The angel visited them and they were not totally overcome. She thought of Isaiah..."In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord sitting upon a throne, high and lifted up and His train filled the temple." (Isaiah 6: 1) And she thought of Abraham and Sarah entertaining the Lord by the oaks of Mamre with meal cakes and calf meat. How Sarah had laughed to herself when the Lord told Abraham she was to have a baby!
Yes the God of scripture had appeared in various ways to His people as He constantly guided them in His plan. She had thought over the past few years that the vision and voice she witnessed that night had serious implications. She was just an ordinary woman who had experienced an amazing life of accomplishments because God had given her special gifts and talents. And she had known for a long time that she had a powerful and definable realization of the presence of God in her life.
Now she had a special serious responsibility. Whenever she had the opportunity she must tell people about the everlasting, faithful love of God. She must tell them that Jesus is REAL!, that He is the Savior and He is the hope in our world of pain and suffering. She knew she would keep telling the story.
Just last week as she walked the 'skywalk' at MaryFreeBed Rehab facility a woman she did not recognize and had never seen before, approached her. "Aren't you the one who had been told you only had seven weeks to live and that was 2 1/2 years ago?"
She was taken by surprise. How did this woman know that? She had never spoken to her before. She responded with joy, "God did this. He is wonderful."
That same day the man she saw on the elevator asked her, "Why do you think God has been healing you?" Without hesitation she told him, "So I can tell others how much He loves them." He then exclaimed, "That's the way to go, girl!"
Those short simple conversations made her realize she had to keep telling others. Small exchanges, but powerful and perhaps life changing.
"Abraham never wavered in believing God's promise. In fact his faith grew stronger, and in this he brought glory to God. He was absolutely convinced that God was able to do anything he promised."
Romans 4: 20-21
She had a story and she wanted to tell everyone. She never forgot it. She never put it far from her mind. It had been something she had never experienced before. It brought tears to her eyes every time she thought about it because it had been so incredulous, so unexpected, so unearthly...and yet so real.
Now, 2 1/2 years later, she realized some people silently scoffed at her story, some thought she was delusional, some dismissed her as irrational, some now avoided her. But there were others who believed as she did, who had 'goosebumps' upon hearing the details, and were inspired and warmed by her story.
But, no matter what others concluded, she knew she had to share with any who would listen, what she saw and heard that night.
May 26, 2010
She went to bed early that evening. During the past few weeks that month of May, she had not been her usual energetic self so she thought a good night's sleep would help.
They were at their Canadian lake house and the intriguing sound of loons on the peaceful lake lulled her to sleep. The comfortable queen size bed in the downstairs guest bedroom of their roomy lakefront retirement home gave her a feeling of luxury. She knew Dick would soon join her after enjoying the latest baseball game on TV.
It was the middle of the night. Suddenly, she turned over in bed, half awake. Something caused her to stir. What was it? And then a vision appeared directly in front of her face. She partially awoke aware of a glorious event happening right before her very eyes. She saw something wondrous. A beautiful cushioned throne, glistening in a mass of sparkling golden rays appeared before her astonished face. The golden rays looked like sunbeams but they were coming from the throne. They shone with intensity like nothing she had ever seen before. The golden rays kept moving back and forth creating a visual wonder of gold sparkling intensity.
Someone was sitting on the throne and she somehow knew without a doubt that the person was none other than JESUS! Her heart leaped. With breathless anticipation she humbly realized she had a special visit from the Lord Himself. She did not see His face. It was blurred. But there was what looked like a crown on His head shining brightly in sparkling, radiating gold. Everything was glistening in gold, even the plain colored robe He was wearing.
His hands rested on the arms of the throne and in His left hand He held a sphere--circular, multi-colored and radiating in golden sparkles. She wondered ....what did the round ball of magnificent colors and golden rays mean?
Then she heard a voice. He spoke. A voice of authority, power and love filled her ears. The voice communicated warmth as He spoke in beautiful, caring tones. "You will be healed. BUT in My own time-frame".
She not only heard the words but she saw them, like the news updates scrolling across the bottom of the TV screen. The word 'but' was emphasized by the power in His voice and appeared in capitol letters.
And then silence. The vision left. The night surrounded her again.
Her immediate unspoken response was, "That's nice of you, Lord, but I'm not that sick. Please help someone who needs you more than me."
Suddenly Dick awoke. "Janet, who was just talking to you?"
Dick had heard the voice!
Six weeks later she was diagnosed with CNS lymphoma located in the left thalamus of the brain. On July 8, 2010 the oncologist told her she had a rare, aggressive cancer and she had 7 weeks to live.
But she had continued to live, continued to heal ever so slowly and the MRIs continued to be clear since August of 2010!
That vision had sustained her through 16 months of chemo, the inability to walk and then the slow tedious therapy to remind the nerves to work again, the devastating fatigue, the emotional post-brain trauma depression, the fears, the doubts, the questioning, the struggles. Yes, that vision had held on to her and she believed in it.
She wondered about it numerous times. Was that really Jesus or an angel who delivered that message? She knew from the scripture that whenever anyone was visited by an angel or the Lord they fell face downward in a trance. She thought of Daniel and Paul and John. But then she thought of Mary and Joseph. The angel visited them and they were not totally overcome. She thought of Isaiah..."In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord sitting upon a throne, high and lifted up and His train filled the temple." (Isaiah 6: 1) And she thought of Abraham and Sarah entertaining the Lord by the oaks of Mamre with meal cakes and calf meat. How Sarah had laughed to herself when the Lord told Abraham she was to have a baby!
Yes the God of scripture had appeared in various ways to His people as He constantly guided them in His plan. She had thought over the past few years that the vision and voice she witnessed that night had serious implications. She was just an ordinary woman who had experienced an amazing life of accomplishments because God had given her special gifts and talents. And she had known for a long time that she had a powerful and definable realization of the presence of God in her life.
Now she had a special serious responsibility. Whenever she had the opportunity she must tell people about the everlasting, faithful love of God. She must tell them that Jesus is REAL!, that He is the Savior and He is the hope in our world of pain and suffering. She knew she would keep telling the story.
Just last week as she walked the 'skywalk' at MaryFreeBed Rehab facility a woman she did not recognize and had never seen before, approached her. "Aren't you the one who had been told you only had seven weeks to live and that was 2 1/2 years ago?"
She was taken by surprise. How did this woman know that? She had never spoken to her before. She responded with joy, "God did this. He is wonderful."
That same day the man she saw on the elevator asked her, "Why do you think God has been healing you?" Without hesitation she told him, "So I can tell others how much He loves them." He then exclaimed, "That's the way to go, girl!"
Those short simple conversations made her realize she had to keep telling others. Small exchanges, but powerful and perhaps life changing.
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