Recently I had the opportunity to reach out to two of my friends in a very meaningful way. As I was leaving the dining room after our noon meal, I noticed a dear friend having difficulty standing up. Her table mates had left and she was alone. I immediately put on 'nurse mode' and walked over to assist. Nurses will understand what I mean by 'nurse mode' because once a nurse, always a nurse. Having graduated from Columbia University-Presbyterian Medical Center in New York City back in 1959, that training has never left me. "Are you OK?" I questioned. She responded in slurred speech and I knew we had a problem. Long story short......management alerted, emergency called, ambulance arrived and she was taken for observation to nearest hospital. But all the time I stood by her side, wrapped my arm around her shoulders, patted her hand, spoke softly to her not to be afraid because help was coming, constantly giving her assurance I was there to give her stability and comfort. My friend continues to thank me for that day and the comfort she experienced.
About a month later a friend at a nearby table suddenly vomited. Table mates quickly moved away and again I leapt into nurse mode to move to his side. Again management alerted, EMT arrived with stretcher. I stood at his side gently and tenderly rubbing his back while the house staff scurried around, asking questions, wiping the table with towels. I kept reminding him professional help was there. I spoke in a calm, quiet voice, giving him hugs.
Have you ever been in a situation when you are suddenly injured or you throw up in the check-out line of the supermarket? Strangers surround you in panic mode, yelling for help, trying to figure what's going on......and there you are....injured or sick and scared to death! How wonderful when someone stands there with love, calm and assurance. And the manner in which that is communicated is with 'just a touch'. Yes, our hands communicate our hearts of love.
Touch is so important these days with all the social media imploding our lives with short non-personal messaging. Our physical bodies and emotional hearts crave a touch of love. Think about babies. Instinctively a baby cries if hungry or uncomfortable. And what happens when Mommy picks up that baby and holds him/her in love. The baby stops crying and greets Mommy with an adorable smile.
We seniors need touches of love. Many of us have lost our mates and spend many hours grieving. Our children, who we cuddled and held in our arms, think of their own children and basically resort to the "Hi!" hug and "See you!" wave with us elderly parents. But even though we are old, we still need touches of love. Just a hand on an arm, just a quick hug, just an arm around shoulders reminds us that someone does care about us and remembers us. When we place a hand on a friend, our heart is in that hand. Our hands have a great ability to communicate. Unfortunately, our culture has screamed warnings about touching because of sexual innuendos.
I have countless experiences when someone has hugged me, held my hand, patted my shoulders and in that way told me they care about me and any problems I have. And nothing is more glorious when in joy we rejoice at good news with big hugs. I have heard some people were brought up with no hugs and kisses from parents. These folk are starving for love.
What did Jesus do? Luke 18: 16....."People were also bringing babies to Jesus to have Him touch them. When the disciples saw this, they rebuked them. But Jesus called the children to Him and said, 'Let the little children come unto Me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.'" Yes, Jesus hugged the children and held them on His lap. And then Jesus said,"I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it."
Don't be afraid of loving someone by hugging. Of course, do it properly and morally and put those fear mongers to silence. We all need a touch of love. We senior citizens may be in our eighties and nineties but we need touches of love just like a little child.
