Have you ever returned to the house you grew up in or the neighborhood you experienced as a child? It is a fascinating, eye-opener journey. First of all you drive down the long-ago street and you expect it to look as it did years ago. I did just this and I was amazed at the changes. Now keep in mind we're talking about my years on 80 Grand Avenue, Ridgefield Park, NJ during the 1940s, 50s, and 60s. The house is still there, looking great, but Grand Avenue is now filled with parked cars. Everyone must own 3 or 4 cars per family. But the memories that flood your mind and heart as you physically place yourself in that geographical spot is amazing.
Memories are so important, especially when you are in your senior years because they can fill your heart with smiles. Right now I am remembering the happy 61 years married to Dick. Sure I grieved and wept a lot when he died but now my mind is focused on those decades of exciting adventures and activities. And don't think we didn't have disagreements along the way. Fortunately, we never closed the door on our ugly times. We talked it out and loved each other before the lights went out.
As I sit alone these evenings, I remember the family boating adventures when Dick and Glenn were in their kayaks and the girls and I were in the raft floating down a river in western PA, laughing and enjoying the sprays of water. Or planning and building our backyard pool where Dick literally taught scores of young kids, teens and adults swimming lessons. Or the summer we drove west with all four children and visited Glacier National Park with the glorious mountains and wildlife. And those wonderful years living in Canada as retired US citizens and loving Sand Lake as well as the beautiful cold, snowy Canadian winters. Yes, I am sitting alone, but I am surrounded by precious memories.
We all have tons of photos in boxes, books and drawers. Just going through those memories is mind jarring. We were young, look what we could do 50 years ago, and how the kids have grown, and "remember when?" Yes, our lives quickly pass and we are shocked as we realize how "old" we are.
Our lives have stages and we graduate, hardly noticing until in our senior years we are unable to function. We also gradually witness the death of our friends and loved ones. Isn't it amazing.....we are born, we live, we produce, we contribute, we build, we experience, we love......and then suddenly we die. Sometimes expectantly, but many times, without warning. And now in our senior years we think about dying. Am I ready, do I know where I'm going, are all my 'affairs' in order, do I need to mend some broken relationships? Lots to think about. When Dick died I was right there holding him, telling him "I love you",with no regrets, only love that I poured out on him.
Death can be a frightening experience.....we've never 'died' before. Since we've never died, let's make the best of today and tell our stories, what's on our hearts, as we remember those days.
Back in September, 1954, I was entering my freshman year at Hope College and needed a ride. Dick lived in NJ, just bought a new Chevy, was returning to Hope to complete his education and was looking for passengers. A girl from Long Island, Joyce Leighley, and I volunteered. We shared driving and there I was, taking my driving turn in PA. Suddenly a police car drove next to me and blew his horn. My reaction was, 'Oh what a friendly guy" and I waved back. Then Dick said, "Janet, I think he wants you to pull over". Now, a bit frightened, I stopped the car.....I was speeding! I was then directed to the nearest 'Justice of the Peace', told I pay to pay $15.00 fine or spend 3 days in jail. All I could think of was Miss Emma Reeverts, the strict Dean of Women at Hope College, and I knew if she saw 'jail' on my record, forget Hope. Borrowing some money from Dick, I paid the fine but told no one! What a start to college.
Our hearts have much to share so enjoy those memories. Others will laugh and so will you.
