Saturday, August 31, 2013

Tough trials


It was the beginning of August and Dick had become more tired, more exhausted and weak.  Janet was scared and Glenn decided something had to be done.  In Manlius, NY (suburb of Syracuse) Glenn (our son) talked to his friend and neighbor, Dr. A., urologist, and appointments were made for urology, PSA, and with Dr. P., oncologist, in a matter of days.

On Tuesday, August 6, they sat in the private office of the oncologist in Syracuse, NY....the three of them... Dick, Janet and Glenn.  The oncologist studied the computer screen in front of him and spoke very bluntly.

"You have 'advanced prostate cancer'.  Without any treatment you have only a year or 18 months to live.  With treatment, and there are new developments coming out every week in prostate cancer   treatments, you have at least four more years."

The words hung in the air.  Janet studied the doctor's face.  Little emotion showed.  He was used to telling patients the truth, no matter what.  But his voice communicated enthusiasm for the incredible results in cancer research.

She sat there stunned, listening to the statements and thinking.  Dick is 83...turns 84 in December....four more years brings him to 87 - 88.  He's had a wonderful life.  And it's only been this past month that there has been a noticeable decline.  He actively played hockey until he turned 80.  He was still doing 25 push-ups a day just 2 months ago.

The oncologist interrupted her thoughts.  "The bone scan showed no cancer in the bone.  However, it does show an enlarged lymph node in his upper left chest... looks suspicious.  I recommend an immediate biopsy of that lymph node.  Either that will show prostate cancer has spread or it's a different type of cancer.  We can't begin treatment until we know what we're dealing with."

A biopsy of the lymph node was scheduled for the following week back in Syracuse.

As soon as she sat in the car, the tears flowed.  How bizarre, she thought.  First my own cancer, lymphatic cancer in the left thalamus of the brain, leaving her with fragile emotions and right-sided weakness in her arm and leg, so that she could not live alone.  And now the news that Dick's prostate cancer, diagnosed 22 years ago, with successful surgery, cancer free active life for 22 years had returned and spread!  How could she cope???

Plans were made.  Beth volunteered to come to Canada, help them pack, then drive them to Syracuse for the lymph node biopsy.  Dick was now too weak to drive.  So Beth offered to drive them to Michigan on Saturday, August 17, following Friday's biopsy.  The family strongly felt a return to the condo in Holland would be best as they could get lots of help in Holland.

The biopsy gave no complications. However, when Dr. P. reviewed the results of the biopsy he was stunned to discover the radiologist had biopsied Dick's rib bone instead of the lymph node!  The biopsy did not show any cancer in the bone, but the fact remained.  The suspicious lymph node had to have a biopsy.

The 9 1/2 hour drive to MI proved exhausting but Diana and Carin and their families welcomed them. Numerous phone calls made appointments with Dr. G., Dick's oncologist in Holland, MaryFreeBed for Janet's PT follow-up and Botox injections, as well as arranging daily help from Lakeshore Senior Care.

Dick was too weak and tired to assist with Janet's exercises, or to help with household chores and meal preparation or to drive to appointments.  All this took an emotional toll and Janet found herself crying daily.  Too much, too sudden!  Her care-giver had become the one needing care.

They saw Dr. G., the oncologist, on August 27 who reviewed Dick's story and ordered the lymph node biopsy to be done at Holland Hospital.  On Thursday, Janet phoned 'scheduling' at Holland Hospital to find out when biopsy was scheduled.

"We're waiting for the scan to arrive from Riverview Hospital in Alexandria Bay, NY, so the radiologist knows location of lymph node and how to proceed," reported the secretary at Holland Hospital.

"Riverview!" Janet exclaimed.  "That's the wrong hospital.  The bone scan was done at Crouse Hospital in Syracuse!"

More phone calls to Glenn, Dr P., Dr. G. and then...wait, wait, wait.  Labor Day weekend and everyone takes off for the last sweet taste of summer.

Remember Janet, who is in control.  Yes, God has a plan and remember to trust Him! He has provided, wonderful, caring Christian senior care workers who come to the condo 6 mornings a week and help with transportation to appointments, housekeeping, meal preparation, shopping, exercises and positive encouragement.  And a loving family.  God is present and love is strong.  Rest in that knowledge.